Part 1By the time I had graduated college, that keyboard friend of mine had moved back to our home town, Richmond and was playing in a jam band with some other friends of mine. They were pretty good for just getting started. They had a weekly gig at Cary Street Café in Richmond, and would pack the place every week. All the musicians were well above-average quality, except for one, the rhythm guitar player. He didn’t sing, he didn’t write, he just stood there and strummed. Sometimes he didn’t even do that. And most times his guitar wasn’t even plugged in. There was no reason for him to be there except that he was such an incredibly nice guy. It became a joke among the band and the close friends.
The lead guitar player and I had lived together for a while, and had developed an unmistakable chemistry. I’ve played with a lot of other guitar players, but no one as compatible as he was. I got to sit in with them a few times, and it was always awesome. They had a much larger fan base than anything else I had been a part of. It was all very exciting.
When it came time for me to graduate, the plan had always been that I would move back to Richmond and join their band, replacing the jolly green giant. So, I focused my job search accordingly. Sure enough, I found a great job in Richmond, and was ready to start playing with the band. All I had to do was wait until they got rid of the other guitar player and we’d be set. I went to a few practices with them in the meantime, learned all thier songs. Wrote a few new lead parts and vocal harmonies, and everything. One night, the keyboard player asked me to go out for drinks. He sat me down and explained that they didn’t have the heart to kick the guy out, and that they had decided that they were doing well enough as they were, and didn’t want to change anything.
No lie, that hurt.
It was supposed to be just business. He’d understand. He didn’t need the band. He wasn’t even that good. He knew that. I knew it, we all knew it. I had passed up better paying jobs in other towns to come back and play with these losers, and this is what I get. This was a great band, potentially on the cusp of being able to quit their day jobs and go tour, but they were all too afraid to commit to the idea of kicking one bastard out? F-that. I hated all of them for a few weeks. Then I got over it.
Finding good musicians for a band is like dating. You randomly meet some dude who has similar interests, and you plan a play date and see if there is any chemistry. If so, you do it again. If not, you don’t. Sometimes it works, some time it don’t. When it does work out, you get to “make beautiful music together”. But, when it doesn’t, chances are someone gets their feelings hurt in the “break up” process. If you are in a heavily active band and you play with other musicians, sometimes it feels like cheating. It’s all very stupid.
Personally, I think musicians should treat music the way sex was treated in the 60’s. Free love, man. F-ck around with whoever you want, and I will too. If you expect me to be faithful, you’re gonna be sadly disappointed.
Just sayin’.
Popularity: 43% [?]
Newman, as JJ from Good Times would say…Dy-NO-MITE!!!
[Ed. note: I made one small change in the last paragraph. Silly rules
]
Help! I’m being repressed! Come see the violence inherent to the system!
Ha Ha! Seriously though…nice post as always!
i was in a similar situation once when i was in a band. right before i began high school, i was playing with two close friends, and one of them had started the band and invited a guy to play guitar with us, whom none of us had known for all that long. this guy played guitar well. one of my friends also played guitar, but he kind of sucked (he was just starting).
i played bass, at a beginner level, and my friend who started the band played drums reasonably well. our spots weren’t in danger. the ‘new guy’ guitarist gradually got fed up with our friend playing guitar in the band, naturally because he wasn’t that good yet and didn’t contribute too much to the band. the new guy wanted to kick our friend out, and gave us an ultimatum saying, “it’s me or him”.
we picked our friend, and we managed to get a few gigs with that formation. of course there was a bit of sourness between us and this other guy. i was the only one who had to see him at school, though. it was a tough thing to do, but i was glad we chose the way we did.
back in cali i decided to learn the bass… i felt it, i got one, i learned it as abest i could. my good friends weer auditioning bass players- we plaed in a shed in the backyard set-up to be a recording studio. i was just playin for fun and to play.
this was three months and about 15 bass auditions(which i was not auditioning for-just playing for the love and fun of it)…three of the four band members turned to me as well as the previous bass player who had been sitting in on drums and told me i had the best “feel” and groove and potential- but since my ex-boyfriend had been the drummer- there was no way i could play in the furture with them.
they do not play since i moved here.
/hmmm.
//still get texts from the drummer-8 years later…
but as i learned over there, when it comes to bands and music…
///when the eagle flies with the dove…
////?!
but thanks for reminding me and letting me share.
did i mention i love a rainy night?!
happy monday! best of weeks to ya’ll.
Aww, scriole. Inter-band relationships can be a killer. I’ve got a great story about that coming out in a few weeks. Thanks for sharing. Glad you’re enjoying the collumn.
[…] 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part […]
[…] 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part […]
[…] 1Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part […]
[…] Episodes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, […]
[…] Episodes: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, […]